Does rejection always have to suck?
Our 22nd and 23rd book winners are Ayanna Bell (prospective PhD student) and Marcus Flax (incoming PhD student)! Be sure to enter the book giveaway for your chance to win a copy of A Field Guide to Grad School! More details below (at the end of the post). Now, onto the good stuff!
It’s easy to let a fear of rejection dictate how we go about our personal and professional lives. For example, we may choose to forego approaching someone for conversation if we think that they’re going to reject us (although, research suggests that this is unlikely!). We may also choose to forego applying for an award or grant because we think that there’s no way we would get it. Finally, we may wonder whether we belong in academia because we experience so much rejection (e.g., rejection from programs, rejection from awards, rejection from journals, etc.). I’m here to let you know that: 1) Rejection is an inevitability in this business (yes, academia is a business), 2) Rejection is a part of your journey, and 3) Rejection is something to celebrate.
Rejection is an inevitability. The more you put yourself out there, the more rejection you’re going to experience. But also, the more you put yourself out there, the more success you’re going to experience. This is a numbers game. Let’s look at some of my numbers.
During my second PhD application cycle (I wasn’t admitted to any programs my first cycle), I applied to about ten programs. Of those ten, I think I interviewed at five. Of those five, I was admitted to two.
Since 2017, I have submitted an abstract every year to one of my favorite conferences, hoping to secure a coveted presentation slot. It wasn’t until this year that I finally did! Four years in a row, my abstract was accepted as a poster (not a presentation). Although a bit frustrated, I didn’t stop submitting because eventually it had to work out, and I’m so thankful it finally did (receiving feedback from more senior attendees was very helpful). Full disclosure, I did stop submitting abstracts to a different conference because I no longer saw a path forward to presentation there.
As a postdoc, I’ve submitted applications for at least seven small grants (internal and external) and none have been funded. This doesn’t mean that my proposed work isn’t valuable. Rather, it could mean that other applications were more competitive, that other applicants communicated their proposed work better, and/or that others’ proposed work offered a better fit for the funding agency. Someday!
Like I said, this is (largely) a numbers game. Because I’ve opened myself up to rejection, I’ve also opened myself up to new opportunities. Rejection is an important part of the academic journey.
Rejection is a part of your journey. Beyond being inevitable, rejection can be instructive and informative. From my own rejection, I’ve learned how to be a better colleague, mentor, applicant, and writer, among other things. I don’t mean to suggest that every rejection will reveal important insights (definitely not). Rather, I encourage students to reframe rejection as an intermediate experience rather than an endpoint.
I did my own fair share of learning from rejection while on the job market. Although, I’m not quite ready to talk more specifically about my job market experience, I will share that as I moved through my second cycle and secured additional first-round (“screener”) interviews, I started to learn how to better communicate who I was and what I was about. This was, admittedly, a painful process—being ghosted after feeling so much excitement about a department hurts. But, it was made so much more palatable by those willing to provide much-needed feedback, especially difficult feedback like, “You should reconsider talking about your work in this way,” after spending months “perfecting” a research pitch. In the end, this was just the feedback I needed.
So, keep in mind that you may feel multiple things when experiencing rejection—disappointment and pain, but also gratitude. On this point, consider tracking your rejections and welcome opportunities to celebrate putting yourself and your work out there.
Rejection is something to celebrate. Rejection is inevitable and a part of our journey, so we might as well celebrate it! In “The Writing Workshop,” Dr. Barbara Sarnecka describes her group’s use of “Rejection Collections” to “[replace] shame and secrecy with openness and mutual support” (pg. 32). Every time someone in the group receives a rejection—big or small—they add it to the Rejection Collection spreadsheet, noting what was rejected, feedback from reviewers (if applicable), and the “bright side” of the rejection. After an agreed upon number of rejections, they have a party! During the party, three toasts are made (from “The Writing Workshop”; pgs. 34-37):
The first toast is to ourselves. It takes courage to submit things, knowing that most things are rejected. And it’s an act of generosity to share a rejection with the group. So we first drink to ourselves and each other, for having the courage to get all these rejections and the generosity to talk about them.
The second toast is to the people who rejected us. The reviewers, editors, hiring committees, etc. who gave us the big thumbs-down. Judging other people’s work is no fun. Reviewers agree to review as a service to the profession. They put aside their own work to help improve someone else’s, knowing that the authors will be angry rather than grateful for their criticism. Sometimes the reviewers themselves feel defensive, imagining the anger of the authors, and the reviews come out sounding harsh. Judging other people’s work is an unpleasant and unrewarding job, but our disciplines couldn’t function without it. So we drink to the people who do it.
The third toast is to the people who got what we wanted instead of us. The ones who got the grants we applied for, the jobs we wanted, the publications in the journals that rejected us. All of us who are sincerely trying to understand the world and teach others are on the same team, including the people who got the jobs and grants that we applied for over the past few months. So we raise a glass to them and wish them good luck.
Note that Dr. Sarnecka has made “The Writing Workshop” freely available to everyone here: https://osf.io/z4n3t/. There, you can also find an example of a Rejection Collection. And, if you’re a part of my writing community, #100DaysOfWriting, you know that we have a Rejection Collection party coming up this week! If you are not a part of the community and would like to join, you can register here: www.tinyurl.com/100DaysRound8.
Some final thoughts. I’m over a decade into my academic career and I’m still waiting for the sting of rejection to subside. My guess is that it’s not going to. So, instead, I’ve developed a set of skills and strategies to deal with it and move forward from it more easily.
Finally, I happened upon this Twitter thread from someone who recently challenged themselves to a week of rejection. Although it seems that they anticipated being rejected at a high rate, rejection was quite rare. Their rejection journey focused more on social interactions, but we can learn from their experience nonetheless. Being open to rejection can be empowering and lead us in unexpected, exciting directions.
SCHOLAR PROFILE #17: DÉJÀ CLEMENT
The purpose of these profiles is to highlight and connect you to scholars at different career stages doing interesting and important research and service work.
This week, we get to learn about Déjà Clement, who is an MPH and PhD student in Clinical Psychology at Oklahoma State University.
Now, let’s learn about Déjà’s academic journey.
What are your research interests?
My research combines public health and clinical psychology to examine risk (i.e., racism, trauma, social determinants of health) and resilience factors for mental health outcomes (i.e., anxiety, depression, suicide) and health behaviors (i.e., help-seeking) for Black women.
With whom are you working for your PhD?
Within my Clinical Psychology doctoral program, my advisor is Dr. LaRicka Wingate. However, because I am also completing an MPH alongside my PhD, I also have Dr. Carlos Mahaffey as my research advisor within the MPH program.
Why did you choose your PhD institution and advisor(s)?
I chose my PhD institution and advisors mainly because of fit with my advisors. When I interviewed, I looked for "fit" in terms of research interests and direction of research, as well as personality and work style. As a Black woman, it was and continues to be really important for me to have Black advisors who can understand and help me to navigate my experiences as a Black student in academia. I also chose OSU because the department was so welcoming and friendly, and Oklahoma is a pretty cheap place to live.
Please share more about your academic journey.
I completed my undergraduate degree in Psychology with a minor in Public Relations and Business Administration at West Virginia University. As an undergraduate, I had the opportunity to become a Ronald E. McNair scholar. This experience guided my engagement in minority centered research, and helped me to find a home in academia. Mentorship through the program increased my passion to pursue graduate level training, and enforced the importance of representation of racially marginalized individuals in clinical work, scientific research and communication, public dissemination and outreach, and advocacy for equality.
Within the Mcnair program and in the 2 research labs that I was a part of, I conducted behavioral medicine research that examined the impact of racial discrimination on depression, stress, and pain in African Americans. Specifically, I examined the role of race-based rejection sensitivity on depression in African Americans. Alongside my research, I assisted the current graduate students with their research projects and had the opportunity to present research at local and national conferences. I also got really valuable mentoring in preparing my graduate school applications. I finished my undergrad in 3 years. So I graduated from WVU in Fall of 2017 and then started graduate school in Fall of 2018.
When first entering grad school, my research interests were more so focused on risk and resilience factors for suicide in the Black community. As I have moved through my program, my research interests have broadened a little bit in terms of topic (i.e., health behaviors and mental health outcomes). In addition to conducting scientific research, presentations, and publications to benefit underserved populations, I have been engaged in various community outreach programs that aim to connect scholarly research in a way that directly benefits underserved communities. Specifically, as a graduate student mentor within the federally funded McNair Scholars program, American Indians into Psychology program (AIIP), and Psychology Diversified Students Program (PDSP), I help underserved, first-generation, and minority undergraduate students accomplish their goals of going to graduate school. I also help these students develop their own research practices and areas of specialization. I have had the opportunity to teach students about research procedures and further confirm the importance of representation and diversity of minorities across academia.
How did you navigate the PhD application process?
As I mentioned, the McNair Scholars program helped me a lot with my grad school applications. I also got so much feedback from the advisors and graduate students in the psychology department at WVU. I applied to 15 PhD programs and about 3-4 Master's programs. I ended up getting interviews to 2 PhD programs and 2 acceptances to Master's programs. Clinical Psychology PhD programs are really competitive, so that's pretty normal for most people I think. I also got an application fee waiver for being a McNair scholar to most of the programs I applied to which really helped to cut costs. Applying to PhD programs gets really pricey since you're paying for GRE fees, application fees, travel , food while traveling, and professional clothing. So, it definitely adds up. Again, McNair paid a lot of these fees for me and I'm so grateful.
What is one bit of advice you'd like to give new (first-year) PhD students?
You are meant to be here, no matter your background or the path that you've taken to get here. Especially if you're a student from a historically marginalized background, you may have feelings related to imposter syndrome, but you are worthy, capable, and deserving to be in the space you're in. Find your people who help to lift you up and fill your cup. Lastly, take care of your mental health in whatever capacity that looks like for you. As a therapist, I am a big advocate for going to therapy, if you can and feel comfortable utilize the campus clinics as that will help to cut costs of therapy.
Many thanks to Déjà for sharing more about her academic journey!
How to reach me: You are always welcome to email me (letstalkgradschool@gmail.com) or find me on Twitter @tweetsbymidge.
Want to support my #hiddencurriculum efforts? Consider “buying me a coffee” via Ko-fi. All funds will be put back into my Let’s Talk Grad School initiatives (i.e., weekend groups, buying/mailing books, etc.). Learn more about my efforts here.
Let’s give away some books: Readers located in the United States and Canada are eligible to enter the book giveaway to receive a copy of A Field Guide to Grad School by Dr. Jessica Calarco. To do so, complete this survey and note that you only have to complete it once to be entered in all subsequent giveaways! I do hope to expand the reach of the giveaway; however, at the moment, the shipping costs are too great to scale. If you’d like to talk about ways your institution could secure an electronic (or hard) copy, please let me know.
Until next time!
Margaret